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The worst part about rape

You would think that the worst part about rape for a victim is the rape episode itself. That is excruciatingly painful experience, to say the least, which in itself takes an incredible amount of energy and effort to heal, but no, you're far from it. The worst part about being raped is not the rape. The worst part about the rape is not even dealing with the feelings of intense shame, guilt, denial that will hunt you for days, months or a life time associated with the trauma of the event. It even isn't dealing with your shattered sexuality and self esteem, and being triggered by every man-insult or misogyny that crosses your path, which ultimately reminds you of the experience. No, the worst part is neither of this, it is going to the people you trusted the most, the people who claim to be your family, your best friends, your partners, your life mates, telling them your story and as a response being asked "are you sure you remember correctly?". Because you know, most women are not raped by a stranger on the street, as the media would like to tell us. Most women are raped by their husbands, boyfriends, fathers, brothers, uncles, and the closest men in their family. And most rapists are masters at hiding their true nature behind an facade of well meaningness, spotless morality and even sometimes heroic nature. So when you revel what happened to you, it is too inconvenient for most people to change that reality. Because that would entail accepting that all of their life they have been tricked, they have believed an illusion, they have supported someone who is the exact opposite of what they claimed to be. And in a way that makes them an accomplice. So no, it's much more comfortable to say "I'm sure you are just going through a rough time, X would never do something like that to you".

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